He always knows what He’s doing

Two weekends from now I’ll be in Nashville visiting the Dominican Sisters of St. Cecilia for a weekend. This would be the time where typically I’d start freaking out…worrying about what to pack, what will happen when I get down there and a whole bunch of other things.

God is clever though…He always knows how to take care of me.

March 11-13th is the weekend I’m going down to Tennessee.

March 4-5th…the weekend before…I have the biggest youth group event of the year going on. And my co-youth minister is out of town for three weeks and won’t be there to assist me. I’m going in solo (with the help of other people of course…I’m just the one in charge).

How convenient that all this is falling into place at the same time. It gives me no time to ponder or worry about my upcoming trip (with the exception of the week of).

God knows what He’s doing.

Perseverance and discipline

I need to admit something: I am human…just in case you might’ve thought I was a robot or something.

With this new found revelation on your part, I can now admit that I sometimes fail.

Yes. It’s true. I am not perfect. I have struggles like every other human I know. You see, this world is a not so happy place. There are constant distractions that are being thrown your way. Many times if you give into these distractions, they can pull you away from God…if you let them.

I find my biggest obstacle right now, is the internet. It’s a serious problem. The first thing I do in the morning, is turn on my computer and go on facebook. The last thing I do at night is shut down my computer after spending all evening on facebook. I’m even beating the system here at work, and accessing facebook through my computer at home…which is acting as a server.

I’m addicted.

And because of my incessant need to always be connected, I’m missing the most important connection of all…the connection between me and God.

How can I be ready to become a nun if I’m not spending time with Him? How can I devote my life to someone who I’m not taking the time to fall in love with?

Don’t get me wrong, I love Him…with all my heart, but it’s one thing to love someone and another thing to be in love with someone. When you’re in love with someone, you want to spend every waking moment with that person.

This is where I fail.

Granted, not all my time in life is spent on facebook. I do connect with Him in other ways; such as this blog, or reading the bible (not on an every day basis…I seem to have forgotten to do so this week), and reading other Catholic/Christian blogs. It’s my way of connecting with Him, but it’s not spending time with Him.

I lack perseverance. And discipline. And when I do pray (which isn’t often enough) I usually forget to pray for both of them…seems other things are more important and pressing that need more urgent attention.

I think we all struggle with this, if we really take a look at our relationship with Him. Maybe it’s because we take Him for granted…knowing that He will always be there awaiting us with open arms?

What kinds of things do you do to keep disciplined? How do you keep persevering?

No time

Some of you may have noticed the lack of activity with this blog…and I have a reason for it.

Laziness.

I’ve recently taken on a new position at work. One which is changing my hours, changing my workload and changing my habits. Currently I’m in training and I’m away from my computer and my ability to be able to post while at work. I do the majority of my blogging from work as typically that’s when most of my thoughts congeal together to form a post. I usually end up coming home and crashing…doing the facebook and twitter thing and then going to bed.

If you look at that above statement, no where in there does it mention any God time. Enter laziness.

I LOVE spending time with God…face to face…in adoration. I spent time in the adoration chapel last week (Tuesday to be exact) and that was the last time I picked up my bible for bible study…the last time I spent any decent amount of time with God. My laziness has gotten the best of me and I’ve used the excuse of not having any time.

I can’t keep living like this.

We all have our moments when God is more front and center than other times. We are human after all. But we should strive to make Him first and foremost ALL of the time, not just sometimes. It’s hard. Sometimes very hard. But then I think back to Jesus on the cross and I know that there is nothing that I can do that will ever be able to repay God for that. His love for me is just so abounding and while I love Him back, sometimes I know it’s not enough.

I will be spending time with Him today. I’m heading over to the chapel in a little while…and I again get to be in His presence during adoration tonight with my youth group kids. Today, I’m looking forward to a good day. I pray that tomorrow I will be graced with a good day too.

Blessing of the day

Today has been crazy. Crazy at work, crazy physically, crazy mentally…even my possessions are crazed today.

The amazing part of it all? The blessing I get to receive tonight.

I’ve started a bible study and catechism study. Typically I start it at work…shortly after my friend Hollie leaves for the night. Any other day I would be upset and forcing it to happen (distractedly) while at work, just to “get it done”. Today though, is Wednesday. On Wednesday’s I have choir rehearsal…which means that right after work I head up to the church. I usually sit around for about 45 minutes or so reading or just relaxing (as it makes no sense for me to go home since I live a half hour away from the church). Tonight though, I get to do my bible study in our perpetual adoration chapel.

Physically, mentally, and visually in Jesus’ presence. What a blessing!

I’m looking forward to see what He has to say to me tonight. .

P.S. Just as I published this post my boss called me…telling me to stay late if we get busy. I must have something big coming my way tonight!

Finding God

Life is busy.

The world we live in is one of constant go go go. Never to stop and rest.

I find myself always so busy, that when I do have time to just rest, I’m unsettled…I don’t know what to do with myself…I don’t know how to settle myself down and just be.

It’s really hard to quite yourself before God. With all the demands of the world, how does one sit and just clear their mind? How does one just learn how to be?

I don’t have an answer. I do know that God shows up, even in the busy-ness of life. There have been many times where I am on the move, and suddenly I get a glimpse of Him…whether it be through someone else, through something I heard, or something I saw.

He is always around. Always nearby. Always just a prayer away.

While the best time to really hear what God is trying to tell you is in the silence, sometimes he’ll even talk to you in the bustle of life.

Are you listening?